Survivor: South Pacific kicked off last night, and I know I’m a little late to the party.  This is because I was blogging and live tweeting the Big Brother finale, and didn’t have enough time to blog about both 90 minute shows. For this week only, Survivor took a back seat to another show, but don’t worry, nobody puts baby in the corner!

We all knew heading into the episode that the main storyline they were going to follow were the return of Coach and Ozzy, and the introduction of Russell Hantz’s nephew, Brandon Hantz. Sure enough, the show didn’t disappoint as we certainly had our fill of those three last night, including Brandon comparing himself to the nephew of Hitler. (I don’t think your uncle was that bad… )

Mr Translucent

There were some bright spots, with the self conscious law student named John Cochran, who was scared to jump in the ocean with complete strangers while wearing nothing but his underwear on the first day – due to his “translucent” skin. “Papa Bear” also seemed like a genuinely nice guy, and Christine had a few good lines like calling Coach and Ozzy “temporary” players (way to draw the line in the sand on day 1).

Like most seasons, the show started off with a challenge, except this year only the two returning veterans could play in it.  The challenge was basically designed for Ozzy, as the first part of it was to climb up a pole and get a wooden turtle on top, then they had to dig under a pole to squeeze through and finally conclude with a pretty tricky puzzle.  Ozzy tore through the first two parts, and then received a bit of help from his very welcoming tribe on the 3rd part to cruise to victory and get a nice gift basket including a flint to start fire.   Coach, on the other hand, had a welcome colder than Daniele and Jeff’s conversation last night on the Big Brother finale.  His tribe walked away with just Edna to help him carry his things to camp.

Side note:  Ozzy was picked for the Savaii tribe, and Coach on the Upolu tribe

Back in camp, Ozzy got one look at Semhar and instantly had a small crush on her when she recited some poetry.  This resulted in him abandoning plans to build a camp and suggest everyone just go for a swim – in their underwear.  Real smooth, Ozzy. It worked though, but I’m sure the producers probably pushed them a bit in order to keep the male demographic (and those who like ghosts) interested.

Should Mikayla be scared?

Over in the Upolu tribe, Coach was trying to fit in with a tribe that clearly was not happy they got stuck with the “dragon slayer” instead of “amazing” Ozzy, but he got them all to work on building a camp instead of trying to get nip slips of his female tribe members.  It’s a good thing, too.  By the way Brandon reacted to Mikayla’s “sexuality”, I’m not entirely certain we wouldn’t have seen him stabbing her with a bamboo stick while reciting scriptures.  I mean relax bro, you’re freaking out because a girl is wearing a tank top and shorts.  You acted like she was in lingerie trying to give you a lap dance .. wait a few weeks for that (kidding).

Immunity Challenge

After getting to know the few select people the editors decided to force down our throat this week, it was time for the immunity challenge obstacle course.  First, teams had to crawl under this bamboo maze, then run through a bunch of coconuts, climb over a wall, dig for a machete, chop down a bundle of coconuts which they will throw into a basket until it’s heavy enough to lift the banner.  Sounds easy enough, right?

Albert Pulling Up Brandon

It actually was pretty easy, as both teams tore through every part of the challenge staying neck and neck all the way to the very end.  Semhar was adamant about being able to throw the coconuts into the basket, so it was her time to shine, and shine she did not.  In fact, after like two tosses, she said she was tired and wanted to swap out, to which Jeff Probst said no f’in way! (not in those words)  Naturally, her tribe lost by no more than 2 missed coconuts, so all eyes were on her the rest of the episode.  (If you like girls in their bra with boobs practically hanging out, that wasn’t a bad thing for you.)

Ozzy, seeing his targeted showmance lover being brought up as the likely person to be voted out, decided to try and take some heat off her by focusing on “Mr Translucent”, Johnny Cochran. Being a huge fan of the show, this hurt Cochran probably more than he should have let on, but he was freaking out that some guy named “Papa Bear” and a few girls were going to be in the game longer than he was.  I don’t blame him there, I’d be hurt if I were the first target of the season.

Cochran did some light campaigning in camp, but channeled his inner Johnny Cochran during tribal council and pleaded with people to keep him in the game.  (Btw, this was a perfect situation for “If the glove don’t fit, you must acquit” line, but he failed me).  Whatever he said seemed to have worked, because the mood of the tribe turned in his favor, and it was time to vote.

Poet in a bra

By a vote of everyone against Semhar, our lovely “spoken word artist in a bra” was the first one sent to Redemption Island this season, and hopefully it won’t be completely lame like last year.  At one point you had like half of one tribe at redemption island when it was supposed to simply be a one on one duel.

That’s my first recap of the season.  I’m still trying to transition from daily live feed updates in Big Brother to the weekly slow grind of Survivor, so please bear with me while I get used to this.

Gallery

(note: images also posted to my facebook page)